Muppetpastor 3.0

You can blame my drive home Sunday night for this idea. Like a lot of people, my diet does a strange teeter-totter between healthy and fast food. I work a lot, and at my job I cook, so when I’m home, I don’t always want to cook for myself (and my girlfriend). Generally, I just want takeout, which can and does get expensive.

Not as expensive as gas prices, which are higher than ever. (Fuck you, George W. Bush!)

Billy Bragg - The Price Of Oil

And before anyone tells me otherwise, it’s my blog. This means its my opinion, and frankly, I doubt we’d be in the international state we’re in in America if we didn’t have George W. Bush fucking things up and declaring war because “God told him to”. I’m digressing, however.

I’ve been wandering through food markets a lot lately. From mega-marts to discount bulk stores to the Asian markets, I’ve lurked and found things I want, things that scare me, and things that make me extremely curious. I’ve also been really fond of these Japanese gummy fruit things. Which reminds me, I’m out and need to hit the Pittsburgh strip district again.

DJ Yoda - Breakfast Cereal (Ft. Biz Markie)

I tend not to eat breakfast often. It probably stems from my school days, when I’d sleep until the last minute before showering and heading to school. Pair that with the developed inability to eat until about an hour after getting up, and by that time I’m well on my way to work, and you get the picture. When I do eat, it’s usually lunchtime, or on those cases I do eat breakfast, it’s….fast food.

Burger King’s “Cheesy Tots” things are made of potato, cheese, and crack cocaine. Seriously. It’s been my addiction on Sunday mornings. Before that, it was a steak and cheese hoagie from Sheetz, which is a local thing.

The Reverend Horton Heat - Eat Steak

Lunch? Lunch is generally whatever I snag either on the way to work, or at work. Leftovers, fast food, energy bars, whatever I can scavenge, that’s lunch. Washed down with kool-aid, or sometimes a bottle of Pepsi if I had time to stop.

Last week, I picked up a 12 pack of orange soda. I hadn’t had good orange soda in years. Immediately, it took me back to memories of a simpler time. A time of summer days spent in my room making grand space battles with the combined casts of Star Wars, Star Trek, Buck Rogers, and G.I. Joe, of school lunches, of public pools, and of walks with dogs that are now dead (and have been so for many years).

So I’m rocking the orange soda, which does not have caffiene (sadly. I am a caffiene junkie).

R.E.M. - Orange Crush

Dinner, well that depends on where I am. At work, I tend to cook healthy meals for my clients. Lots of chicken, lots of low-fat, low-salt, low-calorie treats. They like it, and I rather enjoy the cooking, if not the cleanup.

I hate cleanup. At work, I have a dishwasher, which in my not-so-humble opinion should be required by law. At home, I am the dishwasher, which annoys the hell out of me. I don;t even use plates half the time, yet they still pile up.

At home, dinner tends to be quick, easy, and with as little cleanup as possible. I made pasta a few days ago. No sauce, just some olive oil, garlic, and cheese. Try it, it’s rather tasty.

Last night, I had cheeseburgers. Quick and easy…

Morphine - French Fries With Pepper

See you on the 1st.